Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Because I may spill a butt load of paint and then instead of easily cleaning it, I have to rush to get towels while my one-year-old plays in the paint. I didn't get pictures, but there were little green footprints across the kitchen floor and hand prints on the oven.
My shirt was a vacation shirt from a sisters cruise three years ago, and my pants were my favorite sweats. Ryan's pajamas got paint all over them too. I am SO bummed I was an idiot, but I learned to not use paint while Ryan is awake, just in case something goes bad. I am laughing about it now, don't worry, and wishing I got better pictures. But this will have to do. Hopefully my warning can help other trying to be ambitious mamas.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
The title is completely obvious. I bought a desk. A funny thing happened the other day. You know how I normally take our bills and put them on the kitchen counter? And how they go from the kitchen counter into a bag or a laundry bin full of crap to take upstairs? And then stuff gets lost and forgotten? Yeah? Well I was cleaning through one of the laundry bins full of crap and going through the unimportant mail that we open, shred, and throw away. Well I opened one from Wachovia that had a check for $250 freaking dollars!!! Yes $250! I couldn't believe it. It was a refund from when we refinanced our car through a new bank. I don't know how we missed that money. We even went through our budget that month. Suffice to say, I was VERY excited about this discovery.
Now I immediately started thinking about the possibilities for this money. Paying off some debt, fixing something in the car, new pants (still desperately needed!) and then I got the idea of a desk. Yes, a desk with a filing cabinet to put all my bills. How wonderful to be more organized right?
I found this cute one after a few days of searching KSL classifieds and a few furniture stores. I found it at WalMart for $130, pretty sweet! As soon as I saw it I was in love. It had the filing cabinet, but wasn't a monster and it fits perfectly where it needs to.
And if you were wondering... I want to get a floating shelf above it for pictures and desk stuff since it doesn't have a hutch, and then I want to do these cute flowers (matching my colors of course) from Design Dazzle. I am so ambitious huh? Someday it will all be up and cute. :) I am almost done with Ryan's room and will post pictures by next week. Super excited about that!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
I've been working out harder to get rid of these 3 pounds quicker, but I find I am so much more hungry. I don't buy sweets any more but I am craving them like crazy! Ah!
Don't those brownies look so good? I bet they are. Instead I am having some crackers. Yes, it's 10:30 pm, but what do you do? I have to snack. Oy, maybe I won't be losing these last few pounds after all.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Right now on Obsessively Stitching, she is doing a quilting week and starting from the very beginning. I am so excited!!! This is one I am going to do!
I have a ton of jeans that I will never be able to fit into that I want to make into a quilt. My sister-in-law just added a ton of fabric to her website, and I think taking some of that fabric and adding it to the jeans will make a fabulous quilt. Now I actually have somewhere to start and am so excited!
Monday, April 12, 2010
At night I am at my heaviest and last night I was 136, which is an awesome sign.
So I am going to officially say that I am 133 and I've lost 7 pounds so far! Only 3 more pounds to go and hopefully I can fit into a pair of 6's!
Sunday, April 11, 2010
I am so glad I was able to find it to post here.
I had the opportunity to speak in church today. I don't necessarily love to, but I can whip up a 10 minute talk and do fairly well, so it's not that big of a deal. But I haven't talked in so long, I was SO nervous! Luckily once I go up there my fears were put aside and I just tried to listen to the spirit so I could speak to the congregations heart's.
I was asked to speak on Gethsemane and Jared was asked to speak on the resurrection. There was one other speaker who went before us, and so Jared had about 5 minutes to speak. He was perfectly content with that! :) I wrote down my talk so I am going to put it on here for record keeping sake, more for me than any one else, but you're free to read it.
"Bro. Hokanson called many times to get a hold of us. Once he did, he gave us the two topics and let us decide who does what. He gave us Gethsemane and the resurrection. Both of those are seemingly difficult topics to me. They both represent such HUGE events in the world and the plan. It seemed like either one I chose, it didn't matter because it was going to be difficult. When I was pondering which one to do, I realized I don't know too much about Gethsemane. I have heard it over and over from teachers and in conference, but never actually studied it. That was when I decided to choose that topic. Jared seemed happy to be able to cover the resurrection.
After I made my decision, I went straight to the source and read about Gethsemane in Matthew, Mark, and Luke. Learning that John doesn't go over it in the same way. My favorite one was Mark so I am going to read that one to you. Starting with the Joseph Smith Translation and ending in Mark.READ: MARK. After I had read this,I thought, that was it? One of the biggest events in the plan and it is covered in only a few verses? Not only that, but it isn't extremely insightful about WHAT happened in Gethsemane . That is when I learned how important it is to study not only these verses, but the topic. And the topic isn't necessarily Gethsemane, but the Atonement. When I think of Gethsemane, I feel sad thinking about the pure agony that Christ went through. But when I think of the Atonement, I feel pure joy. My mind doesn't immediately go to the pain, but the sacrifice and the gift of being able to return home that we have all been given.
In John 16:32-33 it says:__. In an address to CES educators, Elder Neal A. Maxwell said, read paper. (It basically says how sad the apostles were for what was to come with Christ's suffering and death. Elder Maxwell says that it should bring peace, knowing that the plan was to be fulfilled and we can make it back to our Heavenly Father through the atonement. I couldn't find the talk online, but I love Elder Maxwell and his words are so powerful.)
We should rejoice that good wins over evil. I realized while reading the passages of Gethsemane that Satan was ever present. While I was reading it, I thought, how can these apostles fall asleep during such an important time. I worked graveyards and I know what it is to be tired, but this wasn't watching misbehaving teenagers like I did, but being there for Christ. It is unfathomable to me. After reading the verses for the 4th or 5th time, I realized the part where Christ says, Watch and pray that ye not enter into temptation. Christ warns them of the temptation and they still succumb to it in a way. It proves how powerful Satan is and can be. What happened had to happen so that the plan could be fulfilled, and I am so glad that Satan was defeated and a way was made for me and you to be able to return to Father in Heaven.
I feel like as important we all know the Atonement was, it can be taken for granted. I'm not saying in the ways of sin now and repent later and all is good. But taking advantage of the fact that Christ is the Son of God, of course he could do it. I admit that I fell into the thinking of, yes it was painful and agonizing beyond all imagination, but there was never no doubt in my mind that it wouldn't be fulfilled.
In Elder Richard G. Scott's talk last week, he gave some great insights to what it was really like in the garden for Christ. During his talk, I actually had the thought of, who wouldn't have done this sacrifice? I would go through anything and death so the world could have the choice to be saved. But I knew that there is so much more to it than that. Willingness isn't enough alone. Remember Satan clearly was present and if he can make apostles disobey, who knows what would happen. It was right when I had this thought that this part of his talk came up. He says that Christ faced three challenges.
1: 'First, an enormous sense of responsibility, for He realized that except it be done perfectly, not one of His Father’s children could return to Him. They would be forever banished from His presence since there would be no way to repent for broken laws and no unclean thing can exist in the presence of God. His Father’s plan would have failed, and each spirit child would have been under the eternal control and torment of Satan.'
It had to be done perfectly. Knowing this, I probably would not volunteer. I know that I would fail and we would all be forever banished from his presence. Christ knew this. Even being the son of God, it was a heavy responsibility for him to carry. This part makes me appreciate his careful sacrifice even more.
2: 'Second, in His absolutely pure mind and heart, He had to personally feel the consequences of all that mankind would ever encounter, even the most depraved, despicable sins.'
Elder Scott says his mind and heart were absolutely pure. With this in mind, I picture my child, my son, not experiencing, but just watching anything horrific in nature and it tears my heart up. I can only imagine Christ's pure heart having to experience not only one instance, but every single awful sin in existence. Christ's pure heart is something I never realized and am thankful to have learned.
3: 'Third, He had to endure the vicious attack of Satan’s hordes while physically and emotionally pressed to the limit. Then, for reasons we do not fully know, while at the extremity of His capacity, at the time the Savior most needed succor, His Father allowed Him to shoulder the onerous responsibility with only His own strength and capacity.'
I have already mentioned the attacks from Satan, but Elder Scott affirms that Christ received them completely on his own. Elder Scott says, “I try to imagine what an intensely poignant moment it must have been for our Father in Heaven when the Savior cried out from the cross, “My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” I don’t believe Father in Heaven forsook His Son on the cross. I do believe the cry was motivated when that Son felt removed the sustaining support He had always enjoyed from His Father. His Father recognized that the Savior needed to accomplish the Atonement totally and completely on His own, without external support. The Father did not abandon His Son. He made it possible for His perfect Son to win the eternal fruits of the Atonement. ”
He goes on to say, “None of us can ever adequately appreciate in mortality the full beneficial consequences of the Atonement. ”
I feel the truth of that statement with all my heart. There is no way for us to understand it without really going through it, and that isn't even close to possible. Now that doesn't mean we shouldn't TRY with all our hearts to understand it. Elder Scott says:
My reverence and gratitude for the Atonement of the Holy One of Israel, the Prince of Peace and our Redeemer, continually expand as I strive to understand more about it. It is vital that we each learn what we can about it. The Atonement is that essential ingredient of our Father in Heaven’s plan of happiness without which that plan could not have been activated. Your understanding of the Atonement and the insight it provides for your life will greatly enhance your productive use of all of the knowledge, experience, and skills you acquire in mortal life. There is an imperative need for each of us to strengthen our understanding of the significance of the Atonement of Jesus Christ so that it will become an unshakable foundation upon which to build our lives. As the world becomes more devoid of foundational standards and as honor, virtue, and purity are increasingly cast aside in the pursuit of appetite, our understanding of and faith in the Atonement of Jesus Christ will provide strength and capacity needed for a successful life. It will also bring confidence in times of trial and peace in moments of turmoil.
I guess my talk today wasn't so much on Gethsemane as much as it was reiterating that it is something that can't be covered in 12 minutes. Our understanding of this sacrifice is every growing as we study through personal scripture study and prayer and pondering. This is the best way to from Elder Scott's talk, “appreciate the incomparable, eternal, infinite consequences of Jesus Christ's perfect fulfillment of His divinely appointed calling as our Savior and redeemer.”
My understanding has grown on this topic, and I am grateful for being asked to speak today. I know that Christ lives. I know that he suffered for each and every one of us. I know that I can repent of my mistakes and be forgiven because of his sacrifice. I am so grateful for the fullness of gospel in the latter days, that we might know more about the atonement and the plan and our purpose on this earth. I love my heavenly father and my brother Jesus Christ. I know that they love all of us so deeply. I hope that I can be a better disciple of Christ and further my understanding each and every day. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen."
On another note, I have a new teaching companion, and she is so cute! I am so glad to be teaching with her. She also happens to be one of the people I should be visit teaching, so that makes me easier for me to know her. I have some weird anxieties with calling people I don't know. It's crazy, so it was nice to be able to meet her and see what a wonderful person she is. I'm way excited! I love my calling now. The kids are so good most of the time and probably know more than me. But it's fun being their teacher and I hope I am a good one to them.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Something I have learned from Lindsay's DVD's is that you need to be flexing your core at all times. This was VERY difficult to do at first. It probably took me a good 4 weeks before I could even pretend to do it all the time. I am getting better and better at it, but still have a hard time doing it when I am sitting down.
I am posting some pictures of me not flexing and what it looks like when I do a sit up and when I am sitting down. It is not pretty, but it's me. So as awesome as my last post was with my pictures, this is what it is like most of the time. Because honestly, flexing that hard ALL the time would kill me.
So this post is for those of you who might say, "oh I could never look like that!" Because you can! It's not just losing the weight, but training your body to hold it self better, and getting some amazing Spanx (or the Target knock off brand, which I will be purchasing for my birthday! What mushbelly???:)
So jiggly. I took all these pics myself, so sorry
you can't see the whole body.
Doing the sit up. It actually looks much more gross when I am
not concentrating on taking a picture and doing a good sit up.
This is me not flexing. I am not letting it out completely
(like in my first picture from May 09).
Since I have been working out,
it actually feels weird to let it out completely.
Another awesome side effect!
Me flexing a bit so you can get an idea of how much changes.
My favorite picture! Me sitting down!!
I am even trying to flex here,
but it's so hard with the extra skin. There is so much skin,
my body can't pull it in enough,
especially not enough to look good,
so I don't bother for the most part.
Now as you are taking your journey, it might not be pretty, as you can see above, but I have so many other things going good, that I just keep trucking. Pretty soon, I'll learn how to flex all the time and won't need my Spanx, okay, let's make that a maybe. :) Make sure you do the same! Because we can ALL do it!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
I am still at 135. It's crazy to have lost 5 pounds in the first 4 weeks, and then still not lose more. But it's okay. Just from the pictures, I am looking like I lost it. I just wish I would now! Off my butt and thighs please!
I am working out a bit different now. I do my DVD's every other day that includes toning and then take a day off so my muscles can rest. I am not really sure what to do for cardio on the off days. Moms Into Fitness has some stroller exercises that I think I might buy. So in the morning of my off days, we'll get up, eat breakfast, and then go for a walk doing these exercises. I hope it works!
I am actually excited to not do videos everyday. I think I will be able to do some more fun stuff on my off days while Ryan is sleeping. Things seem to be working out pretty well with not being on the internet. It is SO hard not commenting on people's stuff, but I have to do what I have to do. Anyway, on to what this blog is all about! PICTURES!
My shirt is on because I think I was flexing a bit more than
the one with my shirt off. It makes it more realistic.
Feb 2010 (3 weeks into working out)
March 8, 2010 (6 weeks working out)
This pic was also taken at night when I am my heaviest.
So it's not entirely accurate I think.
April 7, 2010 (10 weeks working out)
About two weeks of every other day working out.
Here is another picture of my side view. My arms are up
and it kind of makes me abs do some cool stuff!
Jared wasn't around when I wanted pictures, so I took some myself. The full body ones looked horrible! I looked like I had small head syndrome. So I did some in the mirror. This one was fun.
I found that muscle last month and was SO excited! It's so cool to see my body transforming. I just wish that I could get my skin to change as fast! Oh and take away the stretch marks too, please!
Sunday, April 4, 2010
One of my biggest trials is "not having enough time." I always ask other mommas how they do it. I have always known what my problem was, but made excuses or said how much I needed it. Here it goes: I am addicted to the internet. Whenever I have a spare moment, I HAVE to check my email or Facebook or blogs. When I run out of stuff with those, I am trying to think of something else to do. Watch shows, search for stuff, shop, go on Babycenter.com, etc. These are all such time wasters.
I made excuses saying that if I check it through out the day, then I don't spend much time on it at each sitting. I have said how much I NEED Facebook to help me interact with the outside world being a stay-at-home-mom. I still feel these excuses swimming around in my head. I guess that's when I realized that I am addicted. I have the hardest time saying no and having a butt load of excuses at my back, kind of spells out that I am.
There was a talk today on addiction. Not necessarily addiction alone, but on something else. What I gleamed from this talk was that learning self control is the only way to be free. When I think about it, I do feel trapped by my addiction. There are so many character and spirit building activities that I want to do, but never have the time for.
Another talk pointed out how we all have trials. Silly me, I thought, I don't really have that bad of trials. Then I realized that the person I am is so far away from the person I want to be. Big trials are easy to get over and they are easy to get closer to Heavenly Father, because you turn directly to Him. I can see how big trials are given by Him, because they push us harder towards who we need to become. Of course, it doesn't have to be that way, but it's true. The easier our lives go, the more we forget about how dependent we are on Heavenly Father. We become so selfish and independent, some times forgetting our purpose and falling from the path.
In college, I went through some pretty hard times. That was when I was closest to my Heavenly Father. I knew He knew me and loved me. I studied the scriptures so hard. I was so thirsty for knowledge of the plan and how I could better myself. That is the person I want to be again. But I will never get there if I don't acknowledge my addiction and try to get through it. Oy, what an addiction to have!
We use the internet everyday. I will never be able to get away from it fully. Cutting off our internet just isn't plausible, especially since I use it for work every night. One thing I've thought of is giving myself a time limit to spend a day. Once I hit it, I can't go back on the computer. Or I could just use the computer at night after Ryan goes to bed and after I am done with work. I think I might try both for a week and see what works best for me. Man, even thinking about it is giving my stomach knots. But I know it will be good. I tried it a little yesterday and I cleaned the whole house. It felt so good to get some stuff done. Thank goodness for Easter and conference weekend because Facebook and my blog list were so dead! :)
So here I am, telling the full truth, completely embarrassed by it, but acknowledging the necessity of it. I want to be better. I want to be closer to a person that my Father in Heaven would be proud of. I know that I am not alone in this and that I can turn to Him. Luckily, that is the best part. I am so grateful for the knowledge I have and that I don't have to go through this alone. I am so thankful for Christ and everything He has done for me.
In conference, the choir sang, "He is Risen!" What a beautiful song! Here are the words:
He is risen! He is risen!
Tell it out with joyful voice
He has burst his three days prison
Let the whole wide earth rejoice
Death is conquered, man is free
Christ has won the victory
Come with high and holy hymning
Chant our Lord's triumphant lay
Not one darksome cloud is dimming
Yonder glorious morning ray
Breaking o'er the purple east
Symbol of our Easter feast
He is risen! He is risen!
He hath opened heaven's gate
We are free from sin's dark prison
Risen to a holier state
And a brighter Easter beam
On our longing eyes shall stream
I know Christ came to this Earth. He lived and died so that I might be able to live to the fullest measure of my creation. I can feel His love for me in so many places. He knows me and has given me so many tools to use to become more like Him. I am so grateful for the church I am in and the knowledge I have. I know that there isn't an end at death. I know that families are forever. How grateful I am for that! I am so grateful for temples on this earth so I can be sealed with my husband and our posterity with us. I know that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the Lord's church on Earth. The prophet and apostles are His mouth piece, giving revelation in our day. I want to tell everyone out in the world that Christ has risen! He lives and loves us. My heart is full of joy. I know if we seek Him daily, we will be happy, experiencing true joy. This is my testimony.